Sometimes, Moms have to sit down and write a blog just as a way of pinching themselves to see if they are really awake. I mean, sometimes I find myself thinking that I really can't believe my life and the things that happen “to” me. We all absorb a lot of drama dealing with even the everyday mundane things, but how many of us can take the drama and say it happens “for” them instead of “to” them?
For example, I recently took the girls to Target. We were shopping for school supplies and using one of those two-seater carts that the girls were getting way too big for. I kept mentioning this fact as we went through the store along with the usual litany of items such as keep your hands in the cart, don't stand up, sit down, stop talking so mean, please keep your hands to yourself, you don't really need to tie yourself in, etc etc. Oh, is this boring you? Seem pretty routine? Well then how about the drama of me not being able to locate my pen? Yes, I was very determined to find my pen, searching and searching for it while the kids were busying themselves looking at things on the shelves. I could picture it so vividly in my mind, the clear Bic pen with black lettering. Only it wasn't in my purse. After giving up on the pen, the real drama presented itself.
Sophie was reaching out of the cart while standing up and to place something back on a rack that she had previously lifted. As she leaned out, she missed her placement for her hand and swung around to collide with the side of the cart against her rib cage. I could tell that it hit her in such a way that it would most likely bruise, and her face grew bright red as she looked like she was about to wail. Instead, something else happened. She seized up tight and apparently couldn't get any air. She was also not responding to me asking her if she was okay. I continued to escalate my voice as I grew more and more alarmed and her face began to turn a little blue. I decided that perhaps she had choked on something so I tried to turn her around. She was completely limp in my arms and I as I began to run through my mental checklist of what to do, she began to stand on her own and breathe a little.
Well I guess that is when our Target trip really turned into an adventure. As I sat there trying not to faint out into the isle I noticed a small crowd had gathered and people were talking to me trying to see if we were all okay. Target employees came around and asked if we wanted water. I had water and offered it to Sophie who was now looking like she had downed a bunch of cold medicine. Her eyes were glazed, she had no blood in her face and she acted like she was ready to go to sleep. As she sat there swooning in her seat I decided to hit the road.
I called my doctor on the way to the van and they confirmed that a trip to the E.R. was in order. We all took turns in the car saying prayers for Sophie to feel better, for me to get us to the Hospital okay, and for everything to work out fine. Hours later we determined that she had simply knocked the breath out of her lungs which can be quite a shock to someone. They x-rayed her chest and said she would be bruised but just fine.
The woman giving the x-ray remarked on the girls being twins. “I'm a twin!” she exclaimed and suddenly I had a recollection of meeting this woman before. She had been in the hallway outside of an elevator I was on while in the same hospital some 5 ½ years prior, while visiting my twins in the N.I.C.U. I recounted that visit with her and while she didn't remember it, she did not deny that it could have happened. “We both work here and quite frequently are on that floor,” she told me. I suddenly had a strong urge to hug her and felt that everything was going to be just fine.
Mike had come down to the E.R. to help us get back to the car and back home. Sophie began coming around and was really acting a little strange so we talked about what happened so that she knew nothing was her fault and that everything was ultimately okay.
Maggie was the true teacher in the situation. She kept saying that she couldn't believe how many people came to see if Sophie was okay. She kept saying, “just think about how many people at Target love you Sophie!”
It is so very true. We are connected to each other in such deep and meaningful ways that we are not aware of it until we are faced with circumstances beyond our control. There were a lot of people standing around us, wanting to help, each hearing my concerned cries to my daughter and wanting to DO something. That desire, the one to DO something, exists inside each and every one of us even though we teach ourselves to shut it off sometimes. This desire should really be explored within each and every one of us. How much satisfaction would we all receive in our life if we were always DOING something that mattered? What if we were to tap into that innate concern we have for each other and use it when we need it most? At a time when we are tempted to judge or claim that we are owed more than someone else? In my humble opinion, I think that our natural state is the state that those people found themselves in today while feeling that concern for me and our situation. Our natural state is that of caring for our fellow human beings, not for conquering them. Our natural state is that of loving our fellow humans, not of hating them.